Fucked a guy
Been fucked
Cum in someone's mouth
Had someone cum in my mouth
Rimming
Watched porn together
So as the title of this post says, my sex life is pretty vanilla. Is this a problem? Well I've already bitched about anal in my post The Big A. But what about the others?
Cumming during a blow job. Not sure about this one. I know some people say they like the taste but, ew, really? It ain't nice. I think I'd probably gag. And I can't expect to cum in bf's mouth if I don't reciprocate can I? Anyone like the taste or got any thoughts?
Rimming. Well I think I'd like the sensation :D But, again, ew. It's one thing putting your fingers or cock in, but your tongue? Hmmm. Maybe straight after a shower or something. Anyone got any tips?
Porn. Well I watch it sometimes but not that much. I prefer my imagination if I want to knock one out quickly. So not that bothered about this one. And in some ways I think porn is part of the problem for presenting an unrealistic view of sex.
A lot of the problem of course is making any changes in a long term relationship. After 10 years together how do you bring up something new?
I think the reason much of this stuff hasn't happened so far is that neither of us were particularly sexually experienced or adventurous when we started going out. If one partner is more experienced that's probably better. I'd kind of like a partner with more ideas.
It's not like it's all bad - we do have fun together and have been having sex more often lately. I just wonder if we could have *more* fun. But I'm not fixated (much) on a list of stuff because sex shouldn't be like a tick list right?
I love the guy I'm with so want to make it work. Advice, especially from guys in long term relationships, very welcome.
Yeah, maybe most / all couples (gay/lesbian/het) who are past their first flush of 'mad about you' sex begin to look for greater variety after a while.
ReplyDeletePete and I have been together 7 or 8 years and the vast majority of the time are happy to have sex with each other. Sure - we both shower/bath before having sex coz we do lots of licking and kissing and, OMG! - you MUST get right back behind his ball sack and around and just inside his bum hole!
It's doing stuff like that and playing around with your tongue under the rim of his cock and around his frenum oh and of course, if you can catch it right, his prostate is where half of his orgasm comes from so of course light (or more often quite heavy!) tickling and rubbing there is going to make for ever better build-ups and orgasms!
Many of us can stimulate the prostate from outside but, with a bit of practice, just one finger inside (with everything very well greased) will surely find the spot and produce the most amazing sensations - coz that, afterall, is why (some) people love being fucked.
But if there are loads of places where he likes being stroked or tickled then, freshly washed, he's going to love being licked there. If he likes it a bit rougher, then men's tits are usually sensitive to anything from licking to pinching and (for just a short time) clamping. Insides of his thighs? Back of his ears? Ear lobes? His feet?
We usually spend ages stroking, kissing and licking each other, before we get around to much direct cock play or anything else.
And no, we don't do cock in bum fucking either - but maybe one day?
Hi there, TFI
ReplyDeleteI have been intending to comment on this post for quite a while - sorry it's taken so long.
I think Micky's covered the physical side of things pretty thoroughly. From my perspective, I would suggest that you talk to your bf about extending the repertoire of your sex life. Obviously it needs to be phrased with some care, but it should be possible to broach the subject in a positive and encouraging way - maybe ask him if there's anything else he would be interested in doing in bed (or wherever). It sounds as if you are the more go-ahead of the two of you, so I think you may have to lead on this.
Alternatively, you could just be more adventurous in bed: start exploring parts of his body, especially the ones you don't normally go to, to find out which ones get the best response - and encourage him to do the same to you. I think it's quite difficult for one person on their own to get the same sensations as they can when another person is doing it, so he may well have some surprises.
You mentioned some activities that you might like done to you, but that you don't fancy reciprocating. You might find that your bf doesn't mind it being one-sided, or that these things become more appealing in the heat of the moment, or that you can each find different things you're happy to do that the other enjoys, and even things up that way.
As for ideas, I would suggest the internet: not commercial porn, which tends to be repetitive and often downright boring, but amateurs, i.e. people doing it because they enjoy it. Probably not as easy to find, but likely to be more realistic. There are bound to be relevant forums as well, though finding a worthwhile one might be a bit difficult.
Have fun!
Mark
Thanks for the tips guys! We made some progress on holiday - both in terms of doing new stuff (though nothing crossed off the list yet lol) and talking about it. We'll keep at it, and I won't get stressed by 'the list' either.
ReplyDeleteGood to know you and your partner don't fuck either Micky - I think it's fewer gay guys than porn would have us believe. What happened to your blog btw?